My return to school

I am in the process of applying to graduate school/teaching credential programs. I graduated almost two years ago with my BA so I feel like I’m out of the “school application” phase of my life. I wasn’t sure if I had graduated from this realm until, while filling out the online application, I kept uttering the words, “What?” “Seriously?” “What kind of question is this?” A friend of mine, who is still completing his undergraduate studies, just said to me, “What did you expect?” Clearly I have forgotten what it’s like to be a student.

There is so much confusion around going back to school. Is this the right choice for me? Is this really what I want to do? Is this the right school? The right program? Can I afford this? Does it matter? Will I be able to get a job teaching once I’m done? Believe me, the list goes on. But, in all of this I need to remember to go back to what I stand for. What kind of difference do I want to make in the world, and what do I need to do to make it happen? Thinking about this is the first step, and it’s an important – nay, indispensable – step, but the other (and more important) step is the DO part. I can sit here and drink my delicious coffee all morning (all my life, really) and THINK about what I want to do and what I stand for. The truth is, though, that I will never feel fulfilled until I start doing those things. What is standing in my way of getting in action? What stands in your way when you try to do the same?

awesome students

I got to spend time with engaged, inspired, involved student leaders last weekend.

When I first entered the room I was really nervous and uncertain. In the hall there was the laughter and playfulness of a group of friends. It was such a familiar feeling. Wanting to be a part of the group. Being intimidated by the energy.

I always wonder if I belong. I always wonder if my message and ideas will be accepted. You all seem so cool. And I feel so uncool – welcome back to that feeling from my younger years…yuck.

It feels like I am standing on the edge of a raging river of nervousness and uncertainty.

But it never fails that as soon as I put one foot in the water you are there to help get across. That is who you are. In this case you were student leaders of college orientation programs. You are trained to be welcoming and engaging. But more importantly you are a young person who is energetic and engaged. It is awesome.

I admire you. Envy you. You are the ones who are courageous and who are looking to make a difference. The reasons you do what you do are many. Some of you had a person reach out you when you first arrived on campus so you want to give back that experience to someone else. Some are interested in leadership. Some love interacting with people. Some realize that it is a great way to meet people like yourself.

Here is one of my favorite stories from my experience:

On Friday night Dean Taylor gave a talk. He was a member of his middle school optimists club (years ago). He became the president. In his talk he acknowledged all the people working in orientation as essential in the work of optimism and possibility for students. These people, he said, take on a vital role in making a difference.

He wanted to pass along the presidency of the Optimists club and the way he did it was by giving someone overalls (the kind you wear). Not sure exactly why that symbolized the optimists club. But he gave them to Qasim from University of Alberta. And asked that he take on the leadership by wearing the overalls.

Now, most young people would flinch, hesitate, be embarrassed, and never put them on. But Saturday morning there was Qasim, overalls on taking on his symbolic role.

And this is the kind of young person that gives me hope. You care a great deal. You are learning. You want to make a difference and are willing to courageously put yourself out there in the world to figure out how to make it happen.

Thanks y’all. You (again) gave me hope and inspired me to keep forging ahead trying to find paths for you to thrive on.